Urges, Desires, Wants.

In most spiritual traditions these three concepts spell trouble. And they are a pain in the ass. For instance today: woke up with an urge to ditch practice, and did so arguing that today is the proper moon day not yesterday. I have been fighting an intense desire to make a bowl of cacio e pepe, a huge bowl(pasta with pecorino, olive oil and fistfuls of black pepper) which to me is proof of the addictive qualities of both wheat and dairy. Still battling that one but I think I might overcome it. And finally, amazon emails me today saying thar I might win a $2,500 gift card if I tag everything I like online to my wish list. So, naturally
I spend half my morning fake shopping all over cyberspace because the more you do that the better your chances, no? What all this nutty behavior shows me is that I don’t want to deal with something that is nagging me, and by deal I mean I don’t even want to articulate it, which means that now that I’ve written about it, urge desire and want have done their job. Sometimes you have to leave some hair on the barbed wire fence in order to advance. I ditched practice but I’m holding out on bingeing, and spent fake money on make believe things but get to fi guru out(ha ha I meant to write figure out!) why I’m hiding out under the so called coffee table….

3 thoughts on “Urges, Desires, Wants.

  1. LOL! I wanted to ditch practice too but had a bigger urge to do so yesterday than today. When I looked at Tim Miller’s moon days schedule, it said Tuesday so that’s what I did. The moon was technically to full last night at around 10pm and boy was it a doozy in terms of stirring emotions!!
    Hope you get to practice tomorrow! Missing your practice notes on your blog πŸ™‚

  2. Oh good to hear…mine was really good too but I am afraid it was that way fueled by a little anger πŸ™‚ I think I needed to shed that on the mat so seems to have worked to my advantage because at the end, I felt a lot less fury.
    Every day sure is different! Body, mind, everything.

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